Part 2...Still learning

And so I continued living a life without a partner, I was in contact with men, through various dating websites, but as I'd settled for what ever I got before, I wasn't going to do that again. Despite many dates and coffee's with men, not one of them did anything for me, there was no 'rush' of adrenaline, no chemistry with any of them, while they were very nice, there was no way I was going to jump into bed with any of them. I don't know what it was but I was finding fault with every one of them, yet they were chasing for second, third dates, offering weekends away and so on, but I was always going home alone and still continuing to satisfy myself. I had many men who were really good friends, I'd found it easier to talk to them, I'd never been one to sit and discuss the virtues of lipsticks, and they seemed to enjoy my company, but they were all married, and one rule I stuck to religiously, was not to come between husband and wife, I knew the hurt that caused, never would I have done that! What was wrong with me I'd often wonder? I wondered whether it was something deep within me, I was still a large woman, but that never seemed to bother any of the men I went out with, in fact it was the opposite, which was something I had to work through as both the ex's had denigrated me so very often, telling me I'd always be with them as no one else would want me being a fat cow, my self esteem had been at a very low point for a long time with regard to my body image. No matter what I've done throughout my life, I have never been a lightweight, never been skinny, even when I was growing up as a teenager, I was doing sport seven days a week at city and county level, swimming, athletics, cross country and hockey kept me occupied every day, plus from the age of 13 I worked Saturdays and two evening per week, so no matter how occupied I was physically, I never seemed to be a skinny girl, I had been teased mercilessly at school, this was the main reason I began all the heavy training schedule, it soon shut them up when I was competing alongside the boys and beating them!

But I went through a lot of confusion, sometimes I felt very sexy, my breasts had always been a good hand full, my ass too, but I'd always had a bit of a jelly belly after having the children, I was very ill after both and the post natal exercises were by the wayside, so while I loved my breasts and the cleavage, and the fact I could fill a pair of jeans, but I was still not comfortable in being naked in front of anyone, even at times, in from of myself, sometimes I'd lay on my bed exploring and masturbating with something on, hiding parts of me I didn't want to see.
I still couldn't work out what it was with these men, they just didn't stir me within and I went 12 months without having sex with anyone, it was a young man, not far off my daughters age, who broke the celibacy......I have never told anyone of this either, I suppose maybe shame, as he was only 22 and I was 39 at the time....but here's what happened....and its all true,100% true and has lain at the back of my mind for the last five years, a delicious memory......

My son decided to sell some PlayStation games, and at work we had intranet system, with a whole network for staff, advertisements for property, things for sale, swap, sports events etc, were all on the bulletin board, so I put the games he wanted to sell on there as it was free. I sold a couple and had three left, a young man emailed me to say he wanted to have a look at all three, could I meet him outside the office building the next afternoon, so I said yes of course and thought nothing of it.
The next day, was a Friday, I met him at 4pm, as I was finishing early that day, one of the perks of being a manager, I found his car and chatted for a minute while I got the games out and he had a look, he said he wanted them, could he have my number as he needed to get to a cashpoint and he'd call me to meet with the money over the weekend.

Not a problem, so gave him my mobile number and carried on, walked to get my car and went shopping. I'd been shopping on the way home and had heard the message tone go off while I was paying, but had ignored it until I got back to the car some 10-15 minutes later. It was a good job too, the text was from this young man, I can't even remember his name! But was very saucy indeed, he started off by telling me he'd got the money on the way home, would I meet him later for a drink at a pub near to us both? He'd said where he lived earlier when we first chatted, but then he went on to say I was a sexy looking woman, with a lovely smile, but with the most beautiful arse he'd seen in a long time! so thought he was just having a laugh at my expense. I replied saying I'd meet him, but for him to not take the piss out of me, he was buying a couple of PS games and that didn't give him licence to take the piss, I took what he'd said in the text very negatively indeed!

He immediately texted back, telling me he was deadly serious, and got even more saucy, telling me how he'd gotten a hard on while talking to me, that I'd inadvertantly bent down to him in the car and given him a lovely view of my breasts, and how he wanted to touch and feel, stroke and tease them.....I sat there in the car, surrounded by shoppers going to and from their cars and the store, my face absolutely beetroot red but my clit bursting to be touched, whatever he said, was doing something, he was certainly hitting the right buttons.

I texted back, telling him, he was a very nice young man and that if I was 15 years younger I'd happily jump his bones.....and that he would be ideal for my daughter and not me.....he texted back, telling me he didn't like girls his own age, had always gone out with women much older than himself, preferring a softer yielding body, loving someone teaching him, educating him sexually, the fact that the older woman wasn't full of needyness after sex and being clingy afterwards.

I said I'd meet him later to get the money for the games and have a drink, that was it as far as I was concerned, but thanked him for making me feel very special for a little while. He texted back, would I meet him later that we'd originally said, he wanted to go home and shower....so that was OK, I could do the same, so arranged to meet later.....

I'd just about got home, the text signal went again....a saucy one, telling me how he was now naked after his shower, and how while washing himself, he'd gotten very hard and aroused, thinking of my soft large breasts.......how he wanted to fuck me slowly, fuck me hard, slow, how he wanted his cock between my breasts, and to come like that.....my god I was getting so turned on, my head was telling me to not be so bloody silly, that he was just taking the piss out of me, that it was a bet, then logic would come in, he was still a man, I did have great breasts, and boy, I did want him to fuck me...to break me in again....fear crept in, no man had ever made me orgasm during sex, he was on his way to making me come by bloody text! This was something....he also worked at the same company, and I was a manager and he knew that, and knew the problems I could cause for him if he was being out of order, but I decided to get on with things, shower, change and go out. Text messages kept coming, shit, this bill was going to be a big one.....

I eventually got out of the house, I resisted the urge to masturbate, saving that for when I came home later, I knew it would be a quick meet and drink, so knew I'd not have to wait long....I said bye to my son and told him I wouldn't be long....
Part 3 to follow......